Chapter 5: X Japan's reunion ~ What happens next

Yoshiki's "reunion" message

I'll tell you a little about how X Japan's 2007 reunion went. Of course, I got the first message from Yoshiki. It had to be (laughs).

Yoshiki contacted me asking if I wanted to play guitar on a song that would later become "I.V.", but he didn't tell me anything about a reunion. I started preparing for the recording, but I never got a demo for the song. There was nothing. I got my guitars and equipment ready anyway, and went to the studio with no idea about the song.

When I arrived at the studio, Yoshiki played me a few chords on guitar, explaining: "Like this and this". I said to myself: "These are some complicated chords..." but still kept the back and forth with Yoshiki, and recorded my guitar parts. That's how "I.V." was recorded.

Yoshiki always handed out written scores, and I believe it was no different for the recording of "I.V.". But I can't confirm the existence of the score. Well, I can't read notes, so even if I was shown the score, it didn't really mean anything to me.

During the song's recording, I don't believe I was told that "I.V." was meant to be a new X Japan song. I was just there to play guitar because Yoshiki asked me to, and not because of a reunion or anything like that. During the recording, when I heard the chorus of the song for the first time, I said to Yoshiki: "Yup, the song's very Yoshiki."

After we were done recording the guitar parts, Yoshiki said something to me like: "I'll see you again after the song is finished." I thought he was talking about going out to dinner or another trivial hangout.

And so, I went out for dinner with Yoshiki. It was then when he told me he wanted to release the new song, "I.V." under the name of X Japan. My opinion was along the lines of: "Eh, why not?" I already played guitar on it, I couldn't care less about what name was used. Heath was also present at this meeting, and so was Yoshiki's manager at the time. While we ate, I believe there was also talk about shooting a music video for the song. In other words, X Japan was going to resume activities after a 10-year pause.

I didn't really stop to think too much about X Japan's reunion. Maybe my biggest thought was: "Am I really going to play with that problematic band again?"

In the 10 years between the disbanding of X Japan and the reunion, a lot of the people who used to associate with us distanced themselves. Of course, many people who were there from the beginning stayed in touch, but the people who came along with the band's fame mostly left after the break-up, and I guess that's just how things are. I really dislike those people. Or rather, I guess they can't help but move on to other people who have money. And that's part of the business, too. During that time, I truly felt that change in attitude.

That's why, when X Japan reunited, I generally don't trust anyone who approached me again.

The people before me who are happy to listen

X Japan's reunion also meant reuniting with Toshi, and I was ready to give him a good kick in the ass. But when we met again, Toshi was completely different from the old days. Such was the change, that I didn't feel like kicking his ass anymore. And in the very first few rehearsals after the band reunited, I felt like Yoshiki hadn't played drums in a long time. The reunion took place after about a decade. By no means was everything perfect.

We were scheduled to play 3 Tokyo Dome dates as our reunion concerts, from March 28 to 30, in 2008. However, Yoshiki did not attend any of the rehearsals. Those concerts featured many guests such as Sugizo, Wes Borland of Limp Bizkit, Richard Fortus of Guns N' Roses, Amanda Frei and Katie Fitzgerald of Violet UK, and all of them came to the rehearsals. But since Yoshiki didn't come to the studio, we were unable to rehearse.

On the very last day of rehearsals, I thought that he would at least stop by since it was the final day, but I was immensely disappointed when staff told us he wasn't coming. We rehearsed anyway, using pre-recorded audio of Yoshiki playing live somewhere and adding guitar, bass, and vocals to it.

During the middle of that rehearsal, Yoshiki made a sudden phone call, saying he wanted to talk to me. On the phone, he said he wanted me to play a Violet UK song live. I rehearsed the song for the first time on the very day of the concert, and played guitar for its performance.

Besides, on the first day(March 28), the concert started two hours late due to trouble with the equipment, and the section where the guests were scheduled to appear was scrapped. On the second day, that part was also cut short, and the foreign team was drowning all their frustrations in alcohol. Unexpected situations are part of playing live, but they're a dime a dozen with X Japan. Still, I didn’t worry too much about it, as my mindset was to just do what I was supposed to do.

After the reunion, We were also scheduled to tour not only in Japan but also overseas. It would be X Japan's first ever concert and tour overseas, but I had already experienced those things with Ra:IN. I had been to Taiwan many times, and had already toured Europe, so I personally didn't feel anything too extraordinary with X Japan's international stint.

But, with X Japan, the grade of the hotels I stayed at was much better than with Ra:IN. It was very obvious, but I really noted the differences in treatment. With Ra:IN, some hotels we stayed at had limited hot water, if there was hot water available at all, which wasn't uncommon. When I wanted to wash the sweat off after a show, I felt like an ascetic monk doing waterfall rituals under the cold shower. On the other hand, when touring with X Japan, there was always a hot shower, and each of us had their own spacious bedroom.

In Japan or overseas, the people who stand before me are always happy to listen to the music. No matter what country or location, it is always fun to play live for these people.

Sugizo becomes an official member

After playing live as a support member, Sugizo became an official member of X Japan in 2009. A long time before that, I had known Sugizo since the time of Extasy Summit, and I had no issues with him playing hide's guitar parts. So when Yoshiki said he was thinking about asking Sugizo to become an official member, I didn't think twice about it.

Sometimes Sugizo would ask me about guitar chords and arrangements: "How would you play this riff?" and I would say: "Oh yeah, not like that but something more like this," and those exchanges between us always remind me a lot of rehearsals, back when I was in my 20s, and how I would sit and discuss playing guitar and song arrangements with hide. It feels good to do the same with Sugizo. Even though there isn't a lot of twin guitar harmonizing in newer songs. When we recorded the demo for "Jade", Sugizo asked Yoshiki about the particulars of the guitar arrangement, and then he and I worked it out together.

After the band's reunion, it is Sugizo who often gets his guitar track done first, when recording. With hide, I was always, without fail, to be the first to play backing. For some reason, hide always told me to play first. Later, once hide did play backing first, but he played like me, so I had to tell him: "Don't copy me!"

Recording has changed a lot over time. For Blue Blood, I had to go to the studio even on days when I wasn't recording. Basically, all the band had to be in the studio. We took turns for Jealousy, going to the studio only when we had our own parts to record, and not so much when the other members were recording theirs. And nowadays, the current approach to recording is completely individualized.

Finding my Marshall amp in an unexpected place?!

I think I don't have to tell you this twice, but X Japan hasn't released a studio album since 1996's Dahlia. While I've been asked about the new album, I personally have no idea what's up with it. I've finished recording my guitar parts many years ago. My amps were set up in a recording studio in Japan and I recorded. I might have to reamp eventually, so I might do that together with a re-recording. "I.V."'s chorus is very Yoshiki, but I may or may not be able to say the same for the other songs. But I don't really remember playing any "fast" songs.

While recording my guitar parts, I remember there being unfinished songs that had the melody lines recorded on the keyboard, or someone adding something that sounded like unfinished songs. Around the time of Blue Blood, most of its songs were songs I had been playing since before the band had been signed to a major label, so I already knew them very well and there were no unfinished songs. For Jealousy, all the songs had melodies recorded from the demo stage. But how many years had passed since then? The world has changed a lot, and the way we make demos has changed along with it.

Yoshiki plays guitar in the demos, after the band's reunion. That would have been unthinkable in the past. I don't know if he recorded himself actually playing or if he just created the sounds digitally, but the demo has an actual guitar track in it.

Yoshiki owns many expensive guitars like Fenders and Gibsons. Once when I visited Yoshiki's studio, there were many guitars lined up in a hallway, and I've asked him if he would let me borrow them.

When we played the 2018 Coachella Festival, I also visited Yoshiki's studio in California for a meeting. Like always, Yoshiki did not show up in time (laughs), so I wandered around the studio for a while. I found a lot of amps in the back of the studio, but one familiar amp caught my attention.

"Wait, what? Isn't this amp mine?"

I was sure it was a 50W Marshall amp that I had forgotten in LA. I bought it almost 30 years ago because it was a tiny but mighty amp that sounded amazing. I had to do a double take when I spotted this amp, it was an unexpected turn of events.

I checked it again, and sure enough, it was my Marshall amp. However, upon closer inspection, there was a sticker on the back of the amp with “property of this studio” written on it in English. Wait a minute. When Yoshiki arrived, after a long wait, I told him that the amp belonged to me, and he said: "Oh, really?" and that was the end of it.

I figured it would be too much of a hassle to bring it back to Japan with me, so to this day, my Marshall amp still resides at Yoshiki's studio. I'm fine with that, but it’s my amp, and not property of Yoshiki's studio.

While X Japan has played concerts and recorded material after the reunion, I feel like we as a band used to decide everything together with meetings, back in our amateur days. Being in a band nowadays is very different, and maybe it's also because we're all older. In the past, we used to come up with absurd ideas such as 'Let's give away free fridges as a way to celebrate our new album'. Nowadays, things are very atomized, even though a band is supposed to be a group. I feel a little sad about that aspect.

Yoshiki often calls when there is any new development about X Japan. It often goes like this: "What's up?" and I reply: "Nothing much," and then he'll tell me about whatever the business is

Yoshiki and I still send each other congratulatory e-mails on each other's birthdays. This started when the band went to live in LA. Once when I was coming home from drinking, the driver suddenly got a call on his mobile phone, and it was Yoshiki wishing me a happy birthday. That was the beginning of the exchange that continues to this day. I dislike sending messages on social media, so I prefer to send direct emails. We both remember each other's birthdays, since Yoshiki and I were born in November.

Even if the band isn't active, we send each other birthday e-mails once a year. No witty comments or anything. I'm not good at typing long messages, either.

It's not like Yoshiki and I are on bad terms, this kind of interaction has been going on for a while.

My serious illness in 2016

2016 was a difficult year for me. It was the year when I was diagnosed with colonic diverticulitis. But, before the onset, I had already been suffering with severe pain in my abdomen 2~3 times a year. The pain would cease after about three days, so I just endured it. That went on for several years, and once I felt the severe pain and had a fever so high that I could not be measured with a thermometer, so I was rushed to the hospital. I had developed a blood clot in the portal vein. There, the doctor emphasized that I should be hospitalized, and I was soon sat in a wheelchair and immediately admitted to the hospital. I don't remember much of what happened after that. According to what I've asked, a catheter was inserted into my body and I was continuously treated with a drug that dissolves blood clots. Afterwards, I was transferred to Keio Hospital in Shinanomachi, which Yoshiki had told me about previously, and I stayed in the ICU for about two weeks. I wasn't even able to eat in the first week. That's how bad the situation was.

Yoshiki had cancelled many shows before up until then, but when I was hospitalized with colonic diverticulitis, it was the first time that I thought: "Damn, I screwed up..." As you know, we were scheduled to play England's Wembley Arena in March 2016. It was a venue I was itching to perform at for the longest time, because it was also a venue where Led Zeppelin played.

I was also concerned about the venue's cancellation fee, but Yoshiki told me that it would be fine if the event was postponed instead of cancelled. If Yoshiki said so, then it must be true. His words brought me peace of mind.

Heath was really kind

I believe everyone already knows that Heath passed away on October 29, 2023, at the age of 55. The last time I saw him in person was when X Japan played three concerts at Makuhari Messe in September 2018. It's been six years already. In more recent years, Sugizo invited Heath as a guest to his concert, and they played a few songs together. Yoshiki also invited Heath to his dinner show. I think Heath enjoyed sharing the stage with them, even if it wasn' as X Japan.

Heath was really kind. When we worked together as Dope HEADz, I was hospitalized with appendicitis. Heath went through the trouble of visiting me at the hospital, but I was deeply asleep. And yet, Heath did not wake me up and still left three books for me. He was concerned I would be bored during my time hospitalized. One of the books was a weekly magazine, and the other two were slightly naughty books. I was already 35 years old at the time... I guess he was wishing me good health in more ways than one? Heath was the type of man to make that kind of witty choice.

Musically speaking, Heath loved Iron Maiden and, surprisingly, Van Halen. During rehearsals, he would casually play Iron Maiden riffs on bass, and then Van Halen's "Ain't Talkin' 'bout Love" on guitar, too. He did not only enjoy playing bass, but guitar as well. And from what I could tell, he was a Mötley Crüe fan, too. He had the same Warlock bass as Nikki Sixx.

Heath loved tonkatsu. I'm not talking about any band here, but about food. I have a strong association that Heath's favorite food was tonkatsu because he always ate the tonkatsu bento whenever we took the bullet train while on tour. That's the reason why I placed a tonkatsu sandwich in his coffin at his funeral.

At Heath's floral tribute ceremony, I met with the other X Japan members. However, it happened briefly, and we did not speak much about X Japan.

My guest appearance at the Last Rockstars' show

In November 2023 I was a guest at a the Last Rockstars' show. I got a call from Yoshiki: "The last song Heath played with X Japan was "Rusty Nail", would you like to play it with us?" I had no reason to turn it down. I felt nostalgic playing on the stage, even though it was the Last Rockstars, with a different tempo and everything else from X Japan. A lot of people told me, later, that the audience were happy to see me play, and in turn that made me happy too. While I played guitar, I kept thinking about things like: "Heath would be standing here," and "hide would be in this spot."

Words cannot express the loss of X and X Japan members who I trailed the same path with. It's cruel. I should have been the first one to die. In the "Week End" music video, there's a scene where I die while drinking at a bar counter.

Personally, I've never stopped to think about how many years I have left or what the future holds. I don't know what's going to happen, I could die tomorrow. I can't bring myself to think about that sort of thing, and I have a feeling I'm better off not doing so. hide, Taiji, and Heath probably didn't think they were going to die, the day before. For the time being, all's right as long as I can play guitar. That's all I think.

Regarding X Japan's activity, I guess it'll happen when it has to happen. In my opinion, I think it would be nice to play a celebratory concert when we turn 60. But there are some two years until we turn 60 (laughs).

My unchanging relationship with guitars

It has been over 40 years since I started playing guitar. That's almost half a century. I still feel the exact same way as I felt when I started playing. Even when I was a complete beginner, guitars were like the most fun toy to play with. That continues to this day. Back then, I had no idea that playing guitar would become my livelihood.

After decades of playing guitar, I'm not sure if I've improved. When I see young guitarists playing with so much skill, I simply think: “Wow, they're good." But it doesn't mean I want to be the same. Sometimes I do wonder if I'd be better off if I played harder, however.

I've never tried to practice a more technical playing style. Way back, when we were writing Blue Blood and went to lake Kawaguchiko, I did talk to hide about sweep picking.

At the time, sweep picking and fast-playing was starting to become popular, and many guitarists were placing technique above all else. And while hide and I talked about sweep picking, neither of us ended up playing like that. I did laugh to myself when he did some tapping in the beginning of his solo career, like: "So he did start playing that way!" But in the end, I guess he wasn't into it all that much, since he only used tapping for the solo in "Eyes Love You".

I was shocked to hear Glenn Tipton of Judas Priest use the tapping technique. I thought Judas wasn't that kind of band. I wondered what the hell was happening when I heard the solo of "Painkiller" and there was Glenn Tipton's sweep picking. For the record, I'm not trying to dismiss the importance of technique. When I listen to or see that kind of playing, I do think: "Oh, nice". But, that's all.

My beloved guitar

If I had to choose my all-time favorite guitar, it would be the black Gibson Les Paul custom I still frequently play to this day. I've been playing that guitar for around 40 years now.

This guitar has had its neck broken twice. The first time it happened was when I was very young, and was playing at a music store's event. That day, I was holding two guitars, so I was using both hands. When I went to open the door to the backstage area, I placed the black Les Paul next to the door, but due to poor placement, it ended up getting knocked over. And the worst thing was that the flooring was steel plates. As a result, the neck ended up with a crack. But the spot it got cracked wasn't too bad since I still could play it. I still ended up using it for that day's show.

The second time was when I was recording with X at a studio in Roppongi. A staff member knocked the guitar over while getting it plugged, and the neck broke. I was so sad that I couldn't do anything that day and went home.

Due to these accidents, the guitar became a Custom, since its serial number has been painted over when it was repaired. So, it's a mysterious Les Paul Custom. And with every repair done to it, it gets even more mysterious.

The frets have been re-hammered many times, and the back of the neck has been sanded down, about 30 years ago, to prevent hand pain when gripping it. Back in the day, when X played smaller venues, I would sweat so much that the bridge pieces all rusted, and as a result, three strings would always break easily. The bridge and its pieces have been replaced many times, and by now there are not many original parts left on that Les Paul. While its market value may be in questionable condition, I have no intention to let go of it. It's my guitar, so that doesn't concern me.

There was a time when I used a Les Paul Standard a lot. But the one guitar I can always count on is, of course, the black Les Paul Custom. I even nicknamed it "Mr. Executive Director" along the way, because it's always on duty.

As for what happens next, I believe I'll keep on playing guitar. But after the COVID-19 pandemic, what once had been normal in the world is no longer normal. Even at concerts, for 3 years, people were not allowed to cheer and seats had to be distanced. I'm happy things have gradually resolved and concerts feel more like they did 3 years before.

The moment I feel happiest, is when I put my guitar down after leaving the stage. With X Japan, it would be when "Say Anything" starts playing as the closing song. When it plays, I feel like: "Ah, another successful show. I'm so glad."

The moment just before going on stage, without fail, is always a little frightening. I've always felt nervous, even when I was young, but maybe I feel even more nervous nowadays. I wonder if the tension and fear could come from a sense of responsibility. I always overthink things when I'm about to go on stage: "I'm going to play that song this way..." and so on. As soon as I go on stage, though, it all changes. I'm like: "Just play and get it done." Playing properly, obviously. I'm always doing my best when playing. And then when the show is over, I can relax and tell myself: "Yep, you've done a good job."

There are also moments during a concert when I think: "Ah, it feels great to be standing here."

And the guitar roars away while I experience that sensation on stage. I wouldn't ever trade that for anything in the world.

Final notes

Thank you for taking the time to read this old geezer's memoirs. Please forgive me if you find some mistakes. I will continue to play guitar, together with my friends and departed friends. I hope you'll keep rooting for me.

-Tomoaki Ishizuka-